The Sword of Righteousness
by Isaru
Summary: Finn wins the chance to earn an unbelievable treasure, but what will it entail for our heroic duo?
1. 1: Into the Forest

**Chapter 1: Into the Woods**

**XX**

"I think I can see the forest up ahead!" Finn shouted from atop Jake, towering above the plains. Sure enough, over the horizon stood a great forest, a blanket of moss-green over the vast field.

"Yeah, me too!" the dog replied. He gathered speed and Finn felt a hard gust of wind whip his face.

It was a gorgeous morning in the Land of Ooo. The sun had barely risen in the eastern lands and it watched over the two adventurers as they galloped across the grassy plains. Aside from a few clouds, the blue of the sky extended as far as they could see.

"So, why do we have to go all the way out here for lumber, again?" Finn yelled, holding his hat tightly to his head. "What's wrong with the trees around our house?"

"I told you, dude; the trees in the Forest of Magic Trees are magical! Anything built with their wood is indestructible - and magical!"

"Oh yeah!" Finn said, with a giggle. "It'll be so cool to build that new Gauntlet with magic wood!"

"You said it, buddy!" Jake replied. He stretched out a front paw and gave his companion an enthusiastic fist bump.

When they reached the forest entrance, Jake shrunk to normal size and Finn hopped off his back. From above, the trees had been dwarfed by the canine's massive height. Now, standing before the immense forest, they realized that they were tiny compared to it. The trees nearly pierced the clouds in the sky and all they could see before them was darkness.

"Wow, magic trees sure are big..." Jake said, gazing upon the woods with awe.

"You said it," Finn replied with the same amazement. "Oh well, it's more wood for us! Come on, Jake! It's Deforestation Time!" With that, he took off into the woods with his partner following behind.

As soon as the boy passed the first tree, however, a flash of light followed by a loud siren-like ringing noise brought him to a halt. He threw his hands over his ears and shouted, "What the heck is going on?"

Suddenly, the noise stopped and a wooden face emerged from the tree. It had blue glowing eyes, a long pointy nose, and a broad chin. Above its face was a bush of yellow-ish grass, resembling a blonde wig.

"Congratulations, human!" the tree declared in a suave, manly voice. "You are the one millionth person to enter this forest!"

Colorful confetti poured down on Finn from the canopy. "Trigonomic!" he exclaimed excitedly, " Did ya' hear that, Jake? I won something!"

"Uh, I don't know about this, Finn. This happens, like, _every_ time I enter a forest!"

"Oh _psssshhhh_!" he replied, spraying the dog with spit. "I bet you're just jealous that _I _entered the forest before you!"

"No I'm not!"

"Yeah you are!"

"Nuh-_uh!_"

"Yeah-_huh!_"

The tree listened to this exchange for another minute before cutting in. "So... would you like to hear what you've won?"

Finn turned to the tree. "Oh yeah. Tell me what I won already!"

The tree grinned wide. Two branch-like arms crawled out of the trunk. Between his hands, a purple hologram appeared of a magnificent looking sword. The hilt was finely crafted with a ruby pommel and a long, golden cross guard that curved out prominently from the blade, which had a silvery shine, even in the hologram.

"This marvelous creation is the Sword of Righteousness!" the tree declared proudly, "It was crafted by ancient flying dwarfs in the fires of an ancient flying volcano and was meant to be wielded by someone with a truly righteous heart who would use it to slay all the darkest evils that reside in the Land of Ooo!"

"Oooo..." said Finn, fixated on the hologram. "So this is what I won? Awesome!"

He reached out his hands to grab it, but it faded out in a cloud of purple smoke. "Not exactly, my excitable young fellow," the tree said, calmly.

"Hey, what gives, man?"

"This valuable sword is, indeed, your reward." the tree replied, and then his voice grew deep and ominous. "But first, you must find it within this dark, unforgiving forest! Wooooo!" He wiggled his twiggy fingers in Finn's face.

"That sucks!" Finn exclaimed. "I'm the one millionth person to enter this forest! Why can't you just give me the sword?"

_"BECAUSE THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS, THAT'S WHY!"_

Finn held up his hands in apology. "Okay, okay! I guess that's not so bad. We can handle whatever this dumb forest throws at us, right, good buddy?" he said, with a breath of determination.

Jake, however, wasn't satisfied. "Hmm, I'm still not satisfied, man. This whole thing sounds a little bit fishy..."

Finn jumped forward. "So, where do we start, tree-guy-thing?"

The tree's face retreated back into its trunk. The ground beneath the two adventurers suddenly began to shake violently, causing leaves to fall around them. A large gap appeared in the wall of trees, revealing a long path leading into total darkness. Then, with a loud "POP", a wooden sign appeared with an arrow pointing towards this new path.

"I guess that answers that question! You ready, Jake?"

"I thought we were supposed to be gathering lumber, you know, with the magic trees and the deforestation and all that!"

"Senselessly cutting down trees can wait, dude." Finn replied, impatiently. "Magic trees have nothing over the Sword of Righteousness! I may have just learned about it 27 seconds ago, but I know, deep down in my heart, that I was destined by the gods to wield that sword! You know how I'm always going on about righteousness!"

Jake thought about it for a second. Finally, he said with a smile, "Heh, yeah, that _is_ really weird. I guess you're right, Finn! So let's go get that sword, already!"

"Now _that's_ the Jake I know!" Finn shouted.

With another, even more excited fist-bump, the duo took off at full speed into the heart of the forest and into the heart of a new adventure!

**XX**

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**And with that, the adventure begins! **

**Thanks for reading the first of what will be a 3-4 chapter story! I really enjoy writing Adventure Time fiction (although I have several other ideas as well) since the random nature of both the world and the humor allows me to go crazy with it! :)**

**Anyway, please leave reviews and tell me what you think! **


	2. 2: Troll

**Chapter 2: Troll**

**XX**

Finn and Jake had charged into the forest excitedly, eager to find the glorious treasure that they were promised. This bustling enthusiasm, however, did not last very long. After about seven seconds of yelling and laughing, they finally realized the grimness of their situation. They were in the middle of an eery forest that was shrouded in a faint, glowing mist and nearly complete darkness. Everything from crow caws to venomous cobra hisses (and other sounds that the two didn't dare to identify) surrounded them, some from a far distance and others from so close that they would freeze in their steps. Despite being so overwhelmed by the haunted woods, however, the duo continued onward, side by side. They would let nothing keep them from the Sword of Righteousness.

"I don't think I like this place," Finn said nervously. He had his bronze sword held at the ready, and constantly jerked it toward any suspicious sound he heard through the trees.

"Yeah, I hear ya'," Jake replied, "Let's find that righteous sword-doohickey and get the math outta here!"

"How far away do you think it is? We must have been walking this path for at least an hour. Ah!" Finn added, pointing his blade at a strange sound he had heard. It was just a magic tree scratching its nose and it promptly stopped when it saw the sharp point protruding inches in front of its face.

"How should I know? It could be anywhere in this funky place!" Jake exclaimed, then stopped. "Oh wait, I know! Why didn't I think of this before?"

Jake stretched out his legs until he towered over the forest as he had when they had approached it. As he burst through the tree tops (after enjoying the momentary relief of fresh air), he began gazing around the woods for any sign of where they should be heading.

"I don't know, man!", the giant dog shouted to his partner below, "I don't see anything that looks like- oh hey! I think that's it way over there!

Jake had caught sight of a single ray of sunlight beaming over a copse of trees far to the east. On that spot, birds flew to and fro and the wind around him felt drawn to it. With all those naturally occurring elements happening around that area, he figured, it must be special, so that should be their destination.

The dog hurriedly shrunk down to tell his partner what he saw. However, he returned to see Finn standing completely still.

Jake looked up. Before them, half shrouded in the darkness of the forest, stood a gigantic, ugly troll. It was dark skinned and incredibly bulbous. Covering the top half of its body was a leather tunic that, much too small for the massive creature, was heavily torn and did not cover any of the troll's massive belly. Instead, that belly was covered with numerous zits and pustules of various sizes. Its eyes were dull and listless and they was glaring at Finn and Jake. Its large, muscular arm carried a gigantic club that it was beating against its hand.

Finn tightened the grip on his blade and Jake grew his hands into massive fists. "Finally, some real action!", Finn said, "You ready to do some troll slaying, buddy?".

"Yeah, man, let's bust this guy up!", Jake growled, pounding his fists together.

The troll merely raised his hand to halt them. "Wait," it declared, "You do not want to slay me." The troll's voice was clear and deep, unfitting for his utterly dull and grotesque appearance.

"Yes! I! _Dooooo!_", Finn shouted as he jumped into the air towards the towering creature, his sword aimed to slash directly at the troll's chest. However, it quickly raised its club to block. The sword stuck firmly into the wood, and with a strong flick of the troll's wrist, the boy was sent flying like a doll into a tree, his blade following.

Jake yelled, "_Finn!_" then charged at the troll. He was about to jab directly into the monster's massive gut, when the troll's club came back and knocked him into the tree directly opposite of Finn's.

"Finn... I... don't think I want to slay him anymore...", Jake managed, lying against the tree.

"No way, man. We can totally... _ow_... take him." Finn held his sword ready once again, but his arms wobbled.

"Please, hear me out, young heroes," the great troll pleaded, "I know many secrets about you two, Finn and Jake. Truths that would change the way you see one another. If you were to slay me here, those secrets would be lost forever."

Jake giggled and quickly hopped back to his feet. "You mean you've got some dirt on my pal Finn here?", he said, with a laugh and a grin. "Well, why didn't you just say so? Let's hear it!"

However, Finn objected. "No way, man, you're my buddy! I don't want a bunch of secrets to change the way I look at you!"

Jake put his arm around the boy's shoulders."Aw, Finn, nothing this troll says will destroy our awesome friendship! We're the two coolest buds in all the land of Ooo and nothing's ever gonna change that!"

Finn sighed. "Um, okay, I guess..."

"Awesome! Now, throw some truths our way, troll guy!", the excited dog said, pointing to the troll.

"Very well. Did you know Finn once made out with your girlfriend?" it asked, keeping the same dull expression on its face.

Jake's arms immediately flew off his partner's shoulders. "Why, you two timing, double crossing jerk-face!", he shouted, spraying spit as he did.

"Hey! That's not a truth!", Finn loudly replied, wiping the layer of spit off his face, "That's the total opposite of a truth!"

"How could you do that to my sweet Lady Rainicorn? That's not cool, man. That's _far_ from cool."

"He sees you as nothing more than a pet, Jake. He does not value your independence," the troll calmly stated and glared at Finn as if he were a criminal.

Finn pointed at the troll. "You hush your mouth over there!", he shouted, then turned to Jake. "You don't honestly believe this lying turd, do you, Jake?"

"Of course I do, man." the dog explained, standing next to the troll. "This guy's obviously wise and full of, like, tons of insight." (The troll belched loudly, as if in reply.) "Besides, _you're_ the lying turd, kissing another guy's girl!"

"I didn't... _gah!_", Finn yelled, annoyed. He turned to the ugly creature. "All right, you troll. You said you knew secrets about _both_ of us. Let's hear some of Jake's, then!"

"Very well, boy," the monster said in his deep, gentle voice. "It was Jake who took the last slice of pizza you wanted that one time, six months ago."

Finn just blinked, mouth agape. "That's _all_ you have for Jake?"

"Oh yeah, you _would_ bring that up! I told you I was sorry, dude! What more do you want from me? I was hungry!"

"I know, dude, I-"

"You're probably just mad I didn't beg for it, like the obedient dog you want me to be!"

Thunder suddenly crackled overhead. The rain that managed to pass through the distant and thick treetops fell to the ground around the three figures standing apart. The tension between the boy and the dog, who were now staring at each other, was thick. It was all thanks to the troll, who now stood away from them, mindlessly looking for treasure in his left nostril.

"I knew you always thought less of me! You always saw me as your pet, never as your partner!" Jake growled.

"When, Jake? When have I _ever_ done anything that made you feel like a pet?" Finn shouted, full of desperation.

"Remember that so-called _'Collar of Friendship'_ you gave me on my last birthday?"

"I told you, man, that was a _Belt_ of Friendship! It's just that your waist is as thick as your neck!"

"Oh, and _now_ you call me a fatty! That's so like you, Finn!", Jake said, then crossed his arms and turned away from his former friend.

"That's not what I meant!", Finn said, sighing. "Look, we need to find the Sword of Righteousness, man! That's why we're here! We can settle this when we get back to the Treehouse."

"Oh, I'm not going back there with you!", Jake declared, defiantly. "I'm going to find the Sword with my _real_ friend, this smelly troll!" He stretched out his hand to grasp the troll's, who had started to wander away. "Then, we'll travel the land, going on random adventures! It'll be just the two of us, Troll and Jake!"

"But... Jake..."

"Come on, dude," Jake proudly said to the troll, "It's Adventure Time!"

With that, the new duo pranced deeper into the woods, hand-in-hand. Within moments, they were completely hidden through the thick mist and enveloping darkness.

The poor boy fell to his knees, his eyes watering. "But... but that's _our_ thing...", he muttered pathetically as he watched them leave. He then pounded the ground desperately, splashing mud on his shirt, while rain continued to belt his back..

After a few moments, he got back to his feet and shouted out, "Fine! If you'd rather trust that ugly butt over your best friend, then I'll just find the Sword of Righteousness without your help! You'll see!" Then, he blew a loud raspberry that echoed throughout the forest.

Whether it was the new goal at hand or just the onset of forest madness, he suddenly felt even more energetic than he had when he had first learned about the Sword's existence. He was still angry, but now he was fueled by his determination to reach the Sword before Jake. His sorrow was replaced by a mighty grin that seemed to light up the darkness. The rain, appropriately, receded by this sudden change of emotion.

"That's right! I'm going to find the Sword of Righteousness because it's my destiny! With it, I will become the most righteous hero in all of Ooo! Yeah!"

After a quick readjustment of his (now dirty) white cap, Finn took off down another path, shouting and laughing as he had when he had first entered the forest. He dashed along for several minutes. Nothing would stand in his way...

… except for the sudden swift blow he took to the back of the head. He let out a faint moan as he once again collapsed into the mud, sinking into unconsciousness.

**XX**

Two figures, a boy and a girl, emerged from amongst the trees. The boy wore a tattered cloak, a green tunic made of cheap cloth, and carried a large stick. The girl wore a cheesy-looking robe of faded blue.

The girl spoke up. "Wow, a critical hit _and_ a one-hit KO! You're_ th_o lucky!", she said, with a screechy voice and an especially strong lisp. "_Th_o, how much e_kth_perien_th_ do you think he'_th_ worth?"

The boy focused his glasses on the unconscious Finn. "Uh, Sheila, I don't think this is a monster. I think this is an adventurer!"

"Hmm, you're right, Tom. Though with armor thi_th_ cruddy, he probably wouldn't have la_th_ted much longer." She gave a wide grin, with braces that seemed to glisten even in the darkness.

"Heh heh, yeah. Oh well, let's bring him back to the base and see if Lord Andrew wants to do anything with him."

"Yeah, before a level one rat appear_th_ and overpower_th_ him!"

They both let out snort-filled laughs as they dragged the body through the woods. If Finn could see his captors, he would describe them with one fitting word.

Nerds.

**XX**

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**Well, was it worth the wait? I'm very sorry it took so long to get Chapter 2 out. I simply suffered a lack of motivation to write and I couldn't decide on how to continue the story. I now know pretty well how I want it to play out, and it will most likely take two more chapters, plus, perhaps, a short epilogue. Is this a good thing?**

**As always, reviews are welcomed and appreciated! I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and may the next one take significantly less than a month and a half to write! :)**


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